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Fruits of Your Labor ~Dante's Year of Insanity
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Post by Dante on Nov 7, 2016 20:14:07 GMT
Normally the bright rays of sunshine would wake Dante up from his relaxing slumber, but this time it was the sound of rain and wind. A heavy storm was rolling through, and it wouldn't be long until the Palladino house was covered with snow. Dante struggles to find the strength to get out of bed. "So tired... must smoke cigarette." Dante picks his clothes up off the floor from the night before and gets dressed. He puts on a cap and jacket, and heads downstairs. He goes out back and lights up a cigarette, hugging the wall to try and stay out of the rain. (Thinking) "I hate rain. Why can't it still be sunny out?" Dante finishes his cigarette and goes back inside.
Judith is in the kitchen, brewing up a pot of coffee. Dante walks into the kitchen, soaking wet. "Hey, get out of here! You're going to mop up that mess." "Do we even have a mop?" "No. So get some towels and wipe that up." Dante takes off his jacket and shakes the water off, making an even bigger mess. "Well, you haven't tried to hit me yet. Why are you in such a good mood this morning?" "I am getting things ready for our Thanksgiving party." "Thanksgiving?! Why are you even bothering to celebrate that? We have no family here in Japan. Since when do they celebrate Thanksgiving in Japan anyways?" "Shut up and start getting the house ready. I've invited all of our friends from the past year." "You mean the ones that weren't turned into dolls?" "When are you going to get on that and save the rest of the Defectors and Team Takashi?" "When Wormmon stops eating cheeseburgers."
"Say, where is the little guy anyway?" Wormmon comes hopping down the stairs wearing a crappy little cardboard pilgrim hat. "Greetings, savages." "Wormmon? Where did you get that hat from?" "I may have mentioned to Wormmon that there was a holiday dedicated to overeating. It's safe to say he's on board with the concept." "Great. Well there's no getting out of this party now. I'll start getting ready later." "You can start by cleaning up that water you dragged in here. I swear, brother, if I wasn't here to keep you in line, you'd be living in the forest, surrounded by mounds of garbage and soda cans." "Haha! Dante got burned!"
Dante gets some towels and starts wiping up the water he dragged in. "All of our friends from the past year? Oh great..." Dante imagines all of the weirdoes he has encountered in the last year, huddled together around the same table for dinner. The loner Leomon, Dante's voluptuous teacher Mrs. Kurosawa, The Handsome Boys, the psychotic Misty, the cigar smoking mob boss Terriermon, and what if Piedmon decided to crash their party? It's a good thing Team Takashi is still captured. "So, who exactly is coming to the party?" "Well I invited everyone I could think of, but that doesn't mean they will show up." "Gasp! You mean you didn't get their RSVPs?" Judith starts pouring a cup of coffee. "Tell me, is your boy toy Kano going to be here?" "Oh yes, of course! Mmm, that beautiful blonde hair, washboard stomach..." Judith drifts off into thought and pours hot coffee on her hand. "Oww! Hot hot!" "Great. So the Handsome Boys are showing up. I'd better get drunk for this inevitable catastrophe."
(Part 1 of 3)
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Post by Dante on Nov 17, 2016 22:19:27 GMT
The trio spend the day getting the house ready for tonight's party. There are lots of tacky little decorations all around the house. Finally, it's time for the guests to begin arriving. Dante pops open a bottle of wine and pours a glass. "Ahh, nothing like a little wine to relax." "You better pace yourself. We know what happens when you drink too much wine." "Ya, he starts dancing around, then he throws up." "You're taking all the fun out of this stupid November party." There's a knock on the door. Dante walks over to answer it.
The first guests to arrive are Kiyoko and Manabu. Two Tamers Dante and Wormmon met the time they fought the Goddess Azetramon (The Devil's Favorite Mistress). Kiyoko is a young woman with long braided black hair, wearing a formal kimono. Manabu is a punk rocker with a Mohawk, and is wearing a tuxedo t-shirt with a leather vest and ripped jeans. "Dante! You little buggah, come 'ere!" Manabu gives Dante a big hug, squishing his face against his smelly leather vest. "Manabu! It's great to see you too." "Happy Thanksgiving, Dante. I hope we were not late." "No, you're right on time. Come, help yourself to some wine." "Actually, I'm gonna help myself to your crapper for a while. It was a long trip over." Manabu scurries off to the bathroom. Kiyoko pours some wine and sits down on the couch.
Dante hears loud hip hop music blasting. This can only mean one thing, Rob. The music stops, and there's a rhythmic knock at the door. Before Dante can open the door, Rob lets himself in. "Yo yo yo Dante! Are you ready to party?! I brought some apple cider." "Glad you could make it, Rob. At least someone hear knows how to have a good time." Dante stares daggers at Judith. Kiyoko looks concerned. "What? I'm having a good time." Rob sees Kiyoko sitting on the couch and quickly runs over. "Damn, Dante's been holding out on me. I'm Rob. Pleased to meet you, baby." Kiyoko blushes. "Hello, Rob. My name is Kiyoko." Kiyoko offers her hand for a handshake, but Rob kisses her hand. "Oh, I'll call you whatever you want, darlin'. Sugar, honey, bay-bay, sweet cheeks..." Judith walks in and grabs Rob by the ear, dragging him to the kitchen. "Behave yourself!" "Oh, come on, Judith! There's no reason to get jelly."
Before Rob gets settled in, the next guests have already arrived. A long limousine parks right on the sidewalk. Out walks Shirou, Keramon, Terriermon, and Leomon. Shirou is wearing his nicest white suit, and Leomon is wearing a black jacket, but his usual pants. "Dante, how are you this evening?" "Doing great so far. How was the drive here?" "Terriermon wouldn't shut up the whole time." "Oh sure, blame the bunny! You stupid greasy nerd!" Leomon comes walking up behind Shirou and Terriermon, his large iron claw (Leomon's left arm was cut off during his fight with Duskmon, in A Forgotten Odyssey) getting caught in some shrubs. "There's no need to resort to violence, you two. This is suppose to be a celebration." "Leomon, when did you become such a wuss?" Leomon snarls. "You better just get inside, Shirou."
Everyone starts to unwind and enjoy themselves. Wormmon, Shirou, and Leomon are in the living room playing video games. "Watch out, Shirou. My half naked assassin is gonna kick your butt!" "That character is so cheap. Only noobs pick her. But I do love her character module. Ohh yes." "I'm having trouble holding the controller." Dante, Rob, and Manabu are out back smoking cigarettes. Dante is enjoying having his friends over. Judith and Kiyoko are talking in the dinning room, and they've got Terriermon wearing an apron helping out with the cooking. "Stupid broads! Make me help with cooking. The only time a bunny goes in the kitchen is when someone is making rabbit stew." Judith overhears Terriermon complaining. "If you don't shut up, rabbit stew will be on the menu."
There's another knock at the door. Everyone else is too busy or lazy to answer the door, so Keramon floats over and opens the door. Dante's teacher Mrs. Kurosawa walks in. "Ooh, what an interesting Digimon." Shirou and Wormmon both look over at Mrs. Kurosawa, distracted from their game. Leomon manages to kill both of their fighters. "I win!" Wormmon crawls over to Mrs. Kurosawa as fast as he can. "Ooh ooh, Mrs. Kurosawa! Did you miss me?" Mrs. Kurosawa bends down and picks up Wormmon, squishing the Worm King between her breasts. "Oh, of course I missed my favorite cute little bug eyed Digimon!" Wormmon gasps for air. *Muffled voice* "Whoopsie! Did I hurt you, Wormmon?" "A little suffocation was worth it." Leomon reaches over and nudges Shirou. "I bet you wish you could trade places with Wormmon." Shirou speaks quietly so Mrs. Kurosawa doesn't overhear. "She may have a rocking body, but I like brains with my beauty." "You're no charmer yourself. Pale oily skin, greasy hair, no muscle mass..." "I could have you fixed, kitty." "Don't you dare call me a kitty, nerd linger."
Oh boy, this night can't possibly end well. (Part 2/3)
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Post by Dante on Nov 30, 2016 7:09:50 GMT
Eventually, people start to get hungry. Everyone gathers around the dinning table to get ready to eat. Judith is stalling bringing out the turkey, because Kano hasn't arrived yet. Dante walks into the kitchen, carrying a glass of wine with smudges all over the glass. "What are you doing? Bring out the bird!" "Kano isn't here yet. He said he would be here." "Oh come on, he stood you up. We're better off without him and his moron friends." A tiny smart car parks outside on the street. Four young men dressed in school uniforms get out and walk up to the door. "See? I knew they would be here."
Judith runs over and opens the front door. Kano: "Sorry we're late, Judith." Judith jumps up and hugs Kano, clinging onto his shoulders. "Oh, it's okay. I'm so glad you are here." Shirou comes walking out, and Kano sees him. "Hey, Shirou! Get over here!" Shirou smirks, and nonchalantly strolls over. "Ah, The Handsome Boys. Why would you want to talk to me?" Red, their leader, steps forward. "We're still going to make you pay for trapping us out in the desert, after that catastrophic basketball game you set up." Shirou takes his glasses off and wipes the lenses with his shirt. "Really? You are still hung up about that?" "Get him!"
Babi and Leo rush towards Shirou and tackle him to the ground. Kano breaks free from Judith's grasp and drops her on the floor. Leo holds Shirou's arms behind his back, and Babi punches him in the gut. Dante walks in and sees the Handsome Boys attacking Shirou. "Rob! Manabu! Looks like we've got ourselves a Thanksgiving brawl." Rob and Manabu come walking in. Manabu cracks his knuckles. Manabu: "This is great! And I was worried I wouldn't get to kick any ass tonight." "Let's drop these man sluts!"
Dante chugs the rest of his wine and sets the glass down. Rob approaches Red and decks him in the face. Manabu dive tackles Babi, and Dante pulls Leo off of Shirou. Red backs up and takes up a defensive stance. "You wanna mess with the Handsome Boys?! Nobody punches my wonderful face!" Rob goes in for a punch, but Red steps back and lands a kick to the leg. Kano picks up a speaker and smashes Rob in the head from behind. Manabu gets on top of Babi, but Babi pokes him in the eye. Manabu: "Argh! You fight dirty!" Babi grabs Manabu's vest and slams him down.
Everyone else comes walking in to watch the fight. "Whoa! Everyone's fighting." Leomon: "Violence never solves anything." Dante grabs Leo by the collar. Leo panics and throws up his hands in surrender. Dante goes to punch Leo, but hesitates. Leo takes advantage and drops Dante with a kick to the groin. Shirou gets up and dusts himself off. The Handsome Boys have quickly taken the advantage in this fight. "They wanna fight dirty? Wormmon! Do something!" "Alrighty!" Wormmon fires a sticky net at Red's face. "No! Get this gross stuff off my beautiful face!" Red runs around in a panic, unable to see. Manabu gets up and sucker punches Babi in the gut. Manabu charges towards Red and dive tackles him. The two go flying through the coffee table.
Judith's eyes start to bug out. "My coffee table! That's it! Out! Out!" Judith goes into the kitchen and brings back a coffee pot. "Red, Babi, Leo, Kano, I want you to leave right now!" "But baby, we just got here!" "Get out!" Judith waves the coffee pot in the air. Leo walks up to Judith. Leo: "Hey! Take it easy now." Judith goes to splash hot coffee in Leo's face, but Leo ducks and she pours hot coffee all over Kano. "Ahh! You crazy girl!" The Handsome Boys try to shake off their loss, and slowly make their retreat. They all get inside their smart car and drive off.
Dante lays on the ground, trying to recover from a low blow. Rob's head was bashed open from the speaker. Kiyoko wraps a bandage around Rob's head to stop the bleeding. "My Goddess. You shouldn't get into so many fights." "Ya, well, I may have gotten my ass kicked, but it was only because that suck up Kano cheap shotted me with a freaking speaker!" "How bad are you hurt?" "Hey, you don't have to worry about me, baby. How about I play doctor for you later?" Kiyoko slaps Rob in the face.
Judith looks around the house. Furniture is broken. Everyone looks disappointed. Judith starts to cry. "Ahh, all I wanted was a nice Thanksgiving party with all of our friends! And now it's ruined!" Dante struggles to stand up, and gives Judith a hug. "It's okay, sis. We can still have a good Thanksgiving." Dante looks around the room at all his friends. "You know what I'm thankful for? I'm thankful for all of you. Every one of you is special to me. The time we spend together is some of the best time of my life. And I'm so happy we get to experience life's ups and downs together."
Shirou and Rob look at each other, then back at Dante. "That's lame, Dante." "Ya man. When did you become such a wuss?" Leomon: "Oooh, look at me! I'm Dante! I have feelings! Ooooh!" Manabu: "Ahahahaha! Boy, Dante, I want what you are drinkin'." "Shut up! It was a heartfelt speech! Oh, I hate all of you!" Mrs. Kurosawa: "I think it's sweet Dante is able to express himself." Mrs. Kurosawa gives Dante a big hug, squishing Dante's face and messing up his hair. "Can we eat now?" "The turkey should be ready." Shirou leans over to Rob. "You know how something bad always happens to the turkey dinner?" Judith walks into the kitchen and sees Wormmon gulping down the turkey. "Wormmon! You ate the whole turkey!" "Did I do that?" "Oh, I'm gonna squish you, you little bug!" "AHH! Crawl away!" Judith chases Wormmon around the house.
In the end, everyone had a fun evening, and it was one of the better Palladino family Thanksgivings. Meanwhile, Wizardmon is outside watching through a window. "It looks like Dante and Judith had a great Thanksgiving. Well deserved after a whole year of Dante being Wormmon's Tamer. But if Dante thought this year was tough, just wait for what's in store. Best of luck, young Palladino. Wu hu ha ha ha haaaa!" Wizardmon tries to disappear in a cloud of smoke, but doesn't go anywhere. "Stupid staff." Dante opens the window and dumps a bag of recyclables on Wizardmon. "I really need a different hobby."
Part 3/3. Bits please. Or pizza.
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Post by Marshal North on Dec 19, 2016 1:57:46 GMT
That's 5000 bits for you! Good work on that.
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