Faith and Stability [MPC#38 All the me I could be]
Mar 22, 2017 15:18:35 GMT
Post by yuuki on Mar 22, 2017 15:18:35 GMT
The boy was once enshrouded by self loathing feeling. He despises himself... he despises the world that reminded him that whenever he had hope, it's always dashed by something. They said the light is beacon of hope for everyone in the darkness. He used to be light, that light that leads his group. However, his brashness has caused a blemish on his sister's last match. While she doesn't blame him, he does. He blames himself. Everything gonna go wrong if he start take it to his hand... that's why he treated everything with one word:
"めんどくさい."
He often thought that in response to most situation. The him that once acted like he doesn't want to be bothered by anything suddenly got pulled to something outrageous. "...Even though I don't want to get in this troublesome thing," so he think. He doesn't want to get to troublesome thing, but he's not entirely heartless to abandon an egg in front of him. Egg that he thought was an ostrich egg. He still remembered that day.
"...Whoa, this," Koutarou started speaking in amazement. Despite he cannot see the face of his friend who is in Odaiba while he's in Nerima, he could think of the expression he made. "....This doesn't feel like anything that I've seen... seriously, this is huge. But did you paint on it or something?"
The boy's sharp, no-nonsense voice turned uncharacteristically boyish at the look of the image. They soon decided to meet up. However, change of plan happened when he met a certain boy with his Shortmon and the egg cracked.
"I'm your partner! Let's go on adventure!"
...Such word were spoken by that strange animal(?) like being. With that being said, Yuuki was having a headache. He's not sure what to think of it, but he certainly not in mood for adventuring. Sooner or later, they'll somehow encountered problem.
That's what exactly happened.
Angry at himself, angry at that lawyer that killed Kyo, angry at the hero who played hero without strength backing it up. It all spiraled inside of him and it come to one conclusion: I can't trust myself, nor I can trust the other to only bring good for me and my partner. Nobody can solve my problem other than me myself. The individual who hates to get tied into something suddenly took it all upon himself to solve his problem. This guy, for some reason, suddenly got a crest at it.
It shaped like sun, but he felt like it's mocking him. The sun, he used to be like the sun, he used to be the one who illuminate his friends. Now he looked like the cast off shell of that old him. Sun that failed to believe that it could cast off light will never be a sun. Thus, he was eager to toss it away had it not for the little him that guided him to the forest. In that forest... he met a girl who told him that it's fine to believe in himself... so he did.
...However, he once again tossed to the depth of his worst when his partner this time was killed. Oh how he was sooo stupid. It made him laugh in derision and madness.
...He had enough. He wanted to feel like something he did was at least right. He don't want to lose anyone. He wanted to be strong enough to protect everyone, although it's selfish. For that, he heard that the Labyrinth in the forest area somehow could be related to soul searching and getting the answer that he needed. He traversed and suddenly separated from his partner. With his partner nowhere in sight... once again he felt at loss. He have no idea what should he do. He wanted to scream, but his voice held on his throat. Why is he screaming for help when he's actually trying to get stronger? Isn't it counterproductive? He tried to brave himself and walked ahead to the deepest part of the labyrinth. There, he met himself...
"And so you're here, in the depth of the labyrinth, wasting your time for a strength you'll never got. Oh boy, what can you do when you don't even like yourself? I mean, c'mon... if you can't like yourself, why bother with living?"
Yet, for some reason, he's forced to watch this disgusting version of himself who appeared out of nowhere to mock him. He was forced to watch what ifs scenario... scenarios that his other self managed to do amazingly well. However, that's not without sacrifice. He saw him sacrificed many people, including his friends. That perfectness was his true potential... if only he sacrificed those who he hold dear. He never gone to Digital World. He just climbed and climbed and be honor student. He also resumed his judo activity... but for some reason, it came at the expense of other's growth... He's not as liked. In fact, he's so clouded with his perfection that he forgot to look anything else other than himself.
"But hey, to begin with you don't trust many people, do you? Then why don't treat them like how they are? To be used that is."
"...To be used?"
"That's right, to be used. Human by nature flocks with another that gives them benefit. As long as they actually beneficial for you, you will flocks with them. However when you have no more ties with them it's the time to let them go. Isn't that common?"
Indeed, it's common sense. It's also common, but he really felt disgusted.
"Even sacrifice is a form of belief and faith. Faith that they'll be useful to you that is."
"...True, it's a faith... however, that's such a one way faith."
"Isn't that fine?" his other self asked.
"It's not."
"Then aren't you contradict yourself? You contradict yourself and reject to be me, that's why you're weak."
"If you just believe in your own perfection then it's not faith at all. It's merely arrogance. Faith goes two way."
"Cheap words when you're weak. Don't tell me you can beat me through power of friendship? That's too cliched."
"Not power of friendship, but display of friendship. Where are your Hikaru?"
"...I don't need him."
"I see, so in the end, you're nothing but just a simple guy that's too blinded by his own light. How sad."
The other him's face contorted with anger.
"...Heh, look at that, so it's your weakness huh? You don't want to be criticized. Well, that's fine... Go on with your perfectness, but you should know that a perfect one is always alone. Sure there will be lot that grovel in your feet, but..."
The darkness that covers the labyrinth dissipated, revealing form of Alphamon who stood behind Yuuki.
"....only by having equal and having a give-take relationship in mutualistic sense that you can shine. Goodbye, perfection. I'm completely fine with being imperfect but having my friends around to support me."
Without even bothering to look back, the brown haired boy left together with the jet black holy knight, ready to greet the world.
Curse? So be it. Come here, I'll show you this time around that I can overturn everything.
Postplz.
"めんどくさい."
He often thought that in response to most situation. The him that once acted like he doesn't want to be bothered by anything suddenly got pulled to something outrageous. "...Even though I don't want to get in this troublesome thing," so he think. He doesn't want to get to troublesome thing, but he's not entirely heartless to abandon an egg in front of him. Egg that he thought was an ostrich egg. He still remembered that day.
"...Whoa, this," Koutarou started speaking in amazement. Despite he cannot see the face of his friend who is in Odaiba while he's in Nerima, he could think of the expression he made. "....This doesn't feel like anything that I've seen... seriously, this is huge. But did you paint on it or something?"
The boy's sharp, no-nonsense voice turned uncharacteristically boyish at the look of the image. They soon decided to meet up. However, change of plan happened when he met a certain boy with his Shortmon and the egg cracked.
"I'm your partner! Let's go on adventure!"
...Such word were spoken by that strange animal(?) like being. With that being said, Yuuki was having a headache. He's not sure what to think of it, but he certainly not in mood for adventuring. Sooner or later, they'll somehow encountered problem.
That's what exactly happened.
Angry at himself, angry at that lawyer that killed Kyo, angry at the hero who played hero without strength backing it up. It all spiraled inside of him and it come to one conclusion: I can't trust myself, nor I can trust the other to only bring good for me and my partner. Nobody can solve my problem other than me myself. The individual who hates to get tied into something suddenly took it all upon himself to solve his problem. This guy, for some reason, suddenly got a crest at it.
It shaped like sun, but he felt like it's mocking him. The sun, he used to be like the sun, he used to be the one who illuminate his friends. Now he looked like the cast off shell of that old him. Sun that failed to believe that it could cast off light will never be a sun. Thus, he was eager to toss it away had it not for the little him that guided him to the forest. In that forest... he met a girl who told him that it's fine to believe in himself... so he did.
...However, he once again tossed to the depth of his worst when his partner this time was killed. Oh how he was sooo stupid. It made him laugh in derision and madness.
...He had enough. He wanted to feel like something he did was at least right. He don't want to lose anyone. He wanted to be strong enough to protect everyone, although it's selfish. For that, he heard that the Labyrinth in the forest area somehow could be related to soul searching and getting the answer that he needed. He traversed and suddenly separated from his partner. With his partner nowhere in sight... once again he felt at loss. He have no idea what should he do. He wanted to scream, but his voice held on his throat. Why is he screaming for help when he's actually trying to get stronger? Isn't it counterproductive? He tried to brave himself and walked ahead to the deepest part of the labyrinth. There, he met himself...
"And so you're here, in the depth of the labyrinth, wasting your time for a strength you'll never got. Oh boy, what can you do when you don't even like yourself? I mean, c'mon... if you can't like yourself, why bother with living?"
Yet, for some reason, he's forced to watch this disgusting version of himself who appeared out of nowhere to mock him. He was forced to watch what ifs scenario... scenarios that his other self managed to do amazingly well. However, that's not without sacrifice. He saw him sacrificed many people, including his friends. That perfectness was his true potential... if only he sacrificed those who he hold dear. He never gone to Digital World. He just climbed and climbed and be honor student. He also resumed his judo activity... but for some reason, it came at the expense of other's growth... He's not as liked. In fact, he's so clouded with his perfection that he forgot to look anything else other than himself.
"But hey, to begin with you don't trust many people, do you? Then why don't treat them like how they are? To be used that is."
"...To be used?"
"That's right, to be used. Human by nature flocks with another that gives them benefit. As long as they actually beneficial for you, you will flocks with them. However when you have no more ties with them it's the time to let them go. Isn't that common?"
Indeed, it's common sense. It's also common, but he really felt disgusted.
"Even sacrifice is a form of belief and faith. Faith that they'll be useful to you that is."
"...True, it's a faith... however, that's such a one way faith."
"Isn't that fine?" his other self asked.
"It's not."
"Then aren't you contradict yourself? You contradict yourself and reject to be me, that's why you're weak."
"If you just believe in your own perfection then it's not faith at all. It's merely arrogance. Faith goes two way."
"Cheap words when you're weak. Don't tell me you can beat me through power of friendship? That's too cliched."
"Not power of friendship, but display of friendship. Where are your Hikaru?"
"...I don't need him."
"I see, so in the end, you're nothing but just a simple guy that's too blinded by his own light. How sad."
The other him's face contorted with anger.
"...Heh, look at that, so it's your weakness huh? You don't want to be criticized. Well, that's fine... Go on with your perfectness, but you should know that a perfect one is always alone. Sure there will be lot that grovel in your feet, but..."
The darkness that covers the labyrinth dissipated, revealing form of Alphamon who stood behind Yuuki.
"....only by having equal and having a give-take relationship in mutualistic sense that you can shine. Goodbye, perfection. I'm completely fine with being imperfect but having my friends around to support me."
Without even bothering to look back, the brown haired boy left together with the jet black holy knight, ready to greet the world.
Curse? So be it. Come here, I'll show you this time around that I can overturn everything.
Postplz.
